Posts Tagged ‘Sex-Ed’

The Most Commonly Asked Questions Sex-Ed Students Ask

January 17, 2020

 

Whilst I think Sex-Ed should be primarily the responsibility of parents, I can appreciate the reason why schools feel a responsibility to educate students about safe sex and relieve some of their students’ concerns.

If I were teaching Sex-Ed, I would begin by going over some of the most popular questions asked by children to reassure students that their questions are neither unique nor childish or ignorant.

The following fascinating article addresses some of these questions:

Regardless of whether they grew up in the ’80s or the aughts, kids of certain ages always ask versions of the same questions, Roffman has found. For instance, middle-school students, she said, want to know if their bodies and behaviours are “normal.” Many older students ask her at what age it’s normal to start masturbating.

High schoolers routinely ask about romantic communication, relationships, and the right time for intimacy: “Who makes the first move?” “How do you know if you or the other person is ready for the ‘next level’?” “How can you let someone down easy when you want to break up?”  

But some contemporary questions, Roffman said, are very different from those she heard earlier in her career. Sometimes the questions change when the news does. (More than 30 years ago, Roffman started reading two newspapers a day to keep up with the rapid pace of news about HIV and AIDS; she’s maintained the habit since.)

She said she received a flood of questions about sexual harassment after the Senate confirmation hearings for Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas, in the early 1990s. The same decade ended with a spike in student interest in oral sex and behaviors that had previously been considered more taboo, such as anal sex.

Sometimes changing student questions signal broader cultural shifts, like the recent surge in student queries about gender identities. “There would have been questions 20 years ago about sexual orientation, but not about gender diversity,” Roffman said. But one recent eighth-grade cohort submitted questions like “How many genders are there?” “What does ‘gender roles’ mean?” “What is the plus sign for in LGBTQIA+?” and “Why is ‘gay’ called ‘gay’?” She finds a way to answer them all.

 

Special Announcement:

I am donating 100% of the royalties of my hilarious new children’s book, My Favourite Comedian, during the month of January to those affected by the devastating bushfires in my country, Australia. This book is perfect for children aged 9 to 14 and the ideal class novel for Upper Primary students. Please leave a comment to indicate your purchase. You can buy a copy by clicking on this link.

It’s Time to Scrap Sex Ed in Schools

July 3, 2015

 

peter-leigh-citylife

After the latest sex ed scandal, I think it’s high time we made a distinction between teaching that belongs at school and teaching that is best handled by parents at home.

I am not a prude and I understand that there are some bad parents out there who refuse to meet the basic expectations of their role, but the overcrowded school system should not be expected to take on the slack left by parents. It is the responsibility of parents to teach their children about sex, drugs, alcohol, gambling and body image. By handballing these all important life lessons to the classroom, we are enabling parents to continue to act inert and unresponsive.

The comments that caused this latest furor were quite shocking and deeply inappropriate. It was also an attempt to teach girls about having self respect. But you cant teach children how to love themselves. You have to show them they are special, prove to them they are worthwhile and try to extoll their virtues whilst building on their weaknesses. It is extremely unlikely a program or classroom lesson will ever get a child who hates themselves to change the way they perceive themselves.

As I’ve argued before, these programs are essentially boring, preachy, expensive and a burden to teachers trying to cover a crowded curriculum. To students they are just an extension of everything else they dislike about school. In other words, not inspiring at all!

 

Year 7 girls have been warned not to have multiple sex partners or risk becoming like overused sticky tape, in a Christian sex education program at a public Victorian high school.

The students at Fairhills High School, in Knoxfield in Melbourne’s outer east, were also told that a chemical released in females’ brains made them more needy than boys.  

A booklet titled ‘Science & Facts’, that was given to the students, said that “girls are needier than guys in a relationship and always want to be close”.

It said that a chemical called oxytocin, is released when “two people touch”, and was produced by women more than men, making them needier. 

“If a woman becomes physically close and hugs a guy for 20 seconds it will trigger the bonding process, creating a greater desire to be near him. Then if the guy wants to take the relationship further it will become harder for her to say no,” the booklet said.

It warned that having too many relationships could break “this special chemical bond” and harm a woman’s capacity to form future relationships.

“Having multiple sex partners is almost like tape that loses its stickiness after being applied and removed multiple times. So the more you have the harder it is to bond to the next,” it said.

The booklet was given out during a weekly youth program run by Epic Youth, which is part of a Melbourne Pentecostal megachurch called CityLife, and was delivered during school hours in June.

 

 

Click on the link to read Teacher Takes Class on a Field Trip to a Sex Shop

Click on the link to read The Five Day School Trip that Resulted in 7 Students Getting Pregnant

Click on the link to read School Distributes Condoms to 6th Graders

Click on the link to read Should High Schools Install Condom Vending Machines?

A Parent that Means Well Doesn’t Always Do Well

November 13, 2012

Some children get a kick out of watching their parents get irate with school administrators and teachers. They sit back and gladly let their parents fight on their behalf.

Whilst it is important for parents to seek explanations from their child’s school when something comes up, such support is best exemplified with a calm and stable approach. It never works to the child’s benefit when the parent gets too flustered or seeks revenge:

Steven Werner is protesting a Michigan principal’s decision to educate his daughter on porn, calling it an act of bullying and demanding a written apology.

The 10th grade girl went to school on halloween wearing a pink and black female pirate costume the other week, but was called to the Utica High School principal’s office for an outfit that resembled a porn star, Werner tells WJBK. The costume features a short black dress and knee-high black stockings with pink bows.

Werner says that Principal Janet Jones proceeded to tell the teen that she looked like a porn star in the outfit. When the girl asked what a porn star was, “she elaborated to [the girl] what a porn star was and what they do for a living,” Werner said.

“She did say that all men watch porn and it’s a fact of life and I should get real,” he told WJBK. “My daughter was pretty shocked that her principal would explain to her what a porn star is and what a porn star does and about the pornography industry, and I thought it was wrong.”

While the teen wasn’t sent home for her costume, she was told to hide the bows on her stockings, WDIV reports.

The principal should have just come clean and said, ‘Hey, I made a mistake.‘” Werner told WDIV. “I checked the costume, and it looked appropriate. She wasn’t planning on going into porn, and the school doesn’t teach it, and they should keep it out of school.”

In protest, Werner is driving around town in a trailer that says “Mrs. Jones taught my daughter about porn. ‘All men watch porn.'” He says the move is an effort to raise awareness of community happenings, telling WJBK that Jones’ move “is a form of bullying.”

I’m going to take some educated guesses on this report, so please don’t confuse my theories for the facts.

I believe that the child does know what porn is and wasn’t shocked by the comment of Mrs. Jones. Whilst the comment, if said, was humiliating and not appropriate, I can see how schools prefer some basic modesty from their students. That being said, it seems Mrs. Jones could have handled it better.

Mrs. Jones, if this report is in fact accurate, didn’t bully the young girl. The only one in this story that was involved in bullying behaviour was the father, whose response was undignified and completely over-the-top.

Supporting your children is completely understandable, but a character assassination against the child’s principal is counter productive and immature.

Click on the link to read Hilarious Parenting Checklist

Click on the link to read Father Posts Daughter’s Controversial Worksheet

Click on the link to read Dad’s Letter to 13-Year Old Son after Discovering he had been Downloading from Porn Sites

Click on the link to read Mother Shaves Numbers Into Quadruplets Heads So People Can Tell Them Apart

Click on the link to read A Joke at the Expense of Your Own Child

The Innocence of Youth

October 22, 2012

A 7-year old girl writes a precious note that captures the innocence and simplicity of youth. It is just such a privilege to be working with young people. Their view of the world is refreshingly positive and uncomplicated and their tone lacks the sarcasm that adults often project.

 

Click on the link to read Kid’s Cute Note to the Tooth Fairy

Click on the link to read ‘Love’ as Defined by a 5-Year Old

Teachers Advised to Discuss the “Positive Side of Sex” With Their Under-Aged Students!

December 18, 2011

I’m sick of groups filling us up with propaganda to justify their cause. Whether it’s breastfeeding, natural birth or the education equivalent – sex-ed, hardly a day goes by without a study released pointing to the same old conclusions. Whilst these causes all have merit, there comes a time when one gets sick of being lectured to via an endless cycle of propaganda.

There is some validity behind the push to enforce sex ed on classrooms around the world. Like any other area, knowledge about safe sex in particular, makes a great deal of sense. But having witnessed various programs in action, I can’t help but think that sex-ed is extremely overrated.

The idea, as a recent study claims, that children in the absence of sex-ed turn to porn is ludicrous:

Australian researchers Maree Crabbe and David Corlett said children were turning to adult films because schools were not handling the positive aspects of sex.

The researchers presented their findings at a conference at London University’s Institute of Education.

“Discussion of sex and intimacy is too often avoided in schools,” they said.

“Porn has become a cultural mediator in how young people are understanding and experience sex. Porn is our most prominent sex educator.”

Diane Abbott, Labour’s Shadow Health Minister, said: “The rising numbers of girls having under-age sex is alarming. It is not a cost-free phenomenon.

“It poses public health policy challenges and social challenges. The underlying cause must be the ‘pornification’ of British culture and the increasing sexualisation of preadolescent girls.

“Too many young girls are absorbing from the popular culture around them that they only have value as sex objects. Inevitably they act this notion out.

“Government needs to respond to spiralling under-age sex, not with pointless schemes to teach abstinence, but with better PSHE teaching in schools for both girls and boys.”

I find the conclusions of this study extremely difficult to believe for the following reasons:

1. It seems to be inferring that if provided with a sex-ed course children wouldn’t turn to porn. Yeah right!

2. That mandatory PSHE classes would radically minimise the number of under-age sex and boys would come to show more respect to girls having taken the course.

“Up until my sex-ed course, I was treating women like objects, but since my classes, I am a changed person.” Yeah right!

3. I have sat through these classes and an inordinate amount of time is spent on the differences between the male and female anatomy. Whilst this is obviously of some value, most porn stars themselves don’t know the difference between a vulva, clitoris or vagina (even the female porn stars!).

4. Is it really the teachers job to “handle the positive aspects of sex?” If so, I quit! I’ve got more important things to do than promote sex to under-age children. This assertion is downright irresponsible. Can you imagine the outcry if kids came home telling their parents that they want to lose their virginity because their teacher told them that sex is a wonderful thing?”

5. Parents, follow my advice on this one. Your child’s sex education is primarily YOUR responsibility.

I refuse to promote sex in my classroom! I would sooner quit my profession than get involved in such downright immoral and undignified behaviour! If you are worried about girls being treated poorly and kids engaging in under-age sex, don’t point at a lack of sex-ed classes or blame the proliferation of porn. Instead remind parents to do the job they were entrusted with when they decided to bring life into this world.

Let’s cut the propaganda and get back to what we signed up to do – let’s teach the curriculum!

What is the Obsession With Talking About Sex To Children?

October 4, 2011

Nearly every day there is some expert quoting some study about how important it is to talk about sex with your children.  Whilst I have no problem with the message, I wonder why it is constantly being regurgitated.

Why is it always, “teach your children about sex”?  What about teaching your children about manners, selflessness, hard work and respect for others?  Why aren’t these messages seen as important as the “birds and the bees”?

Now they’re telling parents they should talk to their 5-year olds about sex.  My child is 6 and she just discovered that the fish you eat is the same as the fish that swim.  Is this really the time to be discussing sex?

CHILDREN have sex for the first time between the ages of 14 and 15 says a new study, which also suggests that parents should talk to them about their sexuality from as early as the age of five.

I think I will shelve plans of having the “sex” talk for the time being.  I’ve got more pressing problems to tend to – like getting my daughter to eat fish again!

 

Primary Schools Forced To Give Sex Education

September 27, 2011

I don’t object to Sex Education lessons in Primary Schools, but I do object unreservedly to schools continually being forced to undertake programs.  Schools should be able to decide for themselves what extra programs they wish to take on.

Some primary schools are being forced by local authorities to teach sex education to their pupils, a report has claimed.

The research, published on Monday, raises concerns over the “considerable level of inconsistency” across the country. Many local authorities are incorrectly informing primary schools in their area they will not be eligible for the ‘Healthy School’ status if they did not teach sex education, it suggested.

Every week a new program is being established for schools throughout the world.  If it’s not Sex-Ed it’s suicide prevention, bullying, cyber bullying, cyber safety, hygiene, traffic safety, Stranger Danger etc.  Whilst all these initiatives have good intentions and are worthy causes (with perhaps the exception of Stranger Danger), it causes a great strain on teachers already struggling with time constraints.  The more programs undertaken by schools the harder it is to cover the curriculum.

At some point in time we will have no choice but defer some of the responsibility of sex-ed on the parents of our students.  After all, educating ones child about sex is a perfectly reasonable thing to expect from a parent.


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