Below are two clips from a film made by Australia’s behaviour management guru, Bill Rogers. I think all teacher’s will find this useful regardless of experience.
Clip 1
Clip 2
Please share these clips with your colleagues. I’ve attended a Bill Rogers seminar and found it very useful.
I recall a lesson when I was fresh out of University, when I was substitute teaching in school in Newcastle. I was to give out colouring-in sheets to a Grade 1 class. The teacher had supplied me with only 2 or 3 spare sheets for those that made an error. Colouring-in sheets, whilst not of any obvious educational value, is a great babysitting device. Most kids love them because they do not involve any thinking or grading and most teachers appreciate the fact that students can do them both quietly and independently.
On this occasion one of the girls came up to me and asked me for a replacement sheet.
“What’s the matter?” I asked.
“Can I have another sheet? I messed up this one.”
She presented the sheet to me and I was immediately struck by how beautiful it looked. Her worked showed striking attention to detail and great care for staying within the lines.
“But what’s wrong with this picture? It looks fabulous to me.”
“It’s terrible. I made a big mistake. Look, I went out on the lines.”
Even with her pointing to the spot where she trespassed the line I had to squint to see the infringement.
“You don’t need another sheet. This is fine. I wouldn’t even call that a mistake.”
“But I never go out of the lines. Mum told me never to colour out of the lines.”
I don’t know what got into me, but I instinctively gave her a new sheet and asked her to go out of the lines multiple times – this time on purpose.
You should have seen the horror in her eyes.
Then I turned to the class and announced that the class do the same thing. I said I was looking for work that featured colouring out of the lines. The class just stared out in confusion.
“C’mon it’ll be fun. Let’s colour out of the lines!
And all of a sudden they started doing as I suggested. And they loved it! They laughed, coloured with energy and abandon and enjoyed comparing their imperfect work with others.
The girl in question saw her classmates having so much fun making mistakes, she too went back to her desk and revelled in this weird but cathartic exercise. We even sang a colouring out of the lines song.
I don’t know whether I did something constructive or destructive, but I can report that the class looked so much more relaxed and happier when mistakes were acceptable and perfection was bypassed.
Teachers tend to allow the perfectionist to continue their habits. This is because perfectionists are a pleasure to have in the classroom. They take their studies seriously, try their best at all times and listen attentively to instructions.
But the problem is perfectionism is extremely unhealthy. Parents often laugh it off and say, “She get’s that from me. I’m a bit like that too.” But is it really a joke? Perfectionists are on a hiding to nothing because the goal they aim for is impossible to reach. The inevitable consequences of perfectionism is that they never get the satisfaction of their efforts or accept people’s praise because all they can see is what they didn’t get right.
I am all for studious, hardworking students, but not at the expense of their right to enjoy the fruits of their hard work and the joy of basking in their achievements.
There is age rstrictions on Facebook for a reason. The potential outcomes when a pre-teen uses Facebook are severe enough to warrant it a 13+ age requirement.
But does that stop under age kids opening their own account? Of course not.
Washington: Some 7.5 million of the 20 million minors who used Facebook in the past year were younger than 13, and a million of them were bullied, harassed or threatened on the site, says a study released Tuesday. Even more troubling, more than five million Facebook users were 10 years old or younger, and they were allowed to use Facebook largely without parental supervision leaving them vulnerable to threats ranging from malware to sexual predators, the State of the Net survey by Consumer Reports found.” Read the rest, here.
And this is a trend we are seeing all over the world. As important as it is to have this age requirement, it seems too easy to sidestep it.
I believe that if Facebook really wanted to ban under 13’s from setting up accounts, they could.
But do they really want to?
A recent survey seems to show that many parents prefer rest and a quiet drink than spending time with their kids:
A new survey has revealed that stressed adults prefer to kick back with a bottle of wine, rather than spending time with their partners or children.
Six in ten adults said drinking was their top choice after a stressful day, reports the Daily Mail.
While 28 per cent said spending time with their children helped them relax only 26 per cent opted for talking to their partner, according to the poll of 825 adults conducted by industry-funded charity Drinkaware.
It found people battle stress with up to four drinks on a typical evening at home.
Family dynamics have changed over the years. Something like the family dinner is quite different now to what it was in the 60’s and 70’s. Whilst a few drinks is clearly more relaxing than getting the kids ready for bed, it is still important that they receive the love and attention they need.
Ultimately, they need to feel as though they are more important than a drink at the end of a taxing and stressful day.
Sooner or later there will be a drug for everything. No problem self-made or genetic will be without its own medication.
And we will all be worse for it.
I have a very cynical view of the pharmaceutical industry. I don’t believe what they are telling us about how they are giving children with poor concentration a quality of life they wouldn’t ordinarily have. Maybe I should buy in to it, but I don’t. Instead, I believe that they are replacing one problem with the threat of a much bigger problem. The effect of drugs on a child isn’t fully known yet. I fear that when we do have comprehensive data on the effects of drugs such as Ritalin on young children, we won’t like what we see.
The latest drug to concocted is a truancy drug. That’s right, a drug for not wanting to go to school! It is recommended that no child under 18 take it, but whoops, that rules out school aged children! Not much point making a truancy drug for adults.
So they scrap the idea, right? Nope. They find a way to trial the drug on kids aged as young as 11:
SCHOOL truants as young as 11 are being given a powerful ADHD and antidepressant drug in a controversial trial.
The drug, Lovan, is not recommended for anyone under the age of 18 but is being prescribed for children as part of a School Refusal Program being led by Professor Bruce Tonge.
Prof Tonge is chairman of a federal government committee setting new guidelines for the treatment of attention deficit hyperactivity disorder.
But the side-effects are minimal, right? Nope.
Prof Tonge said the children on the trial and their parents had been warned of potential side-effects of Lovan, including suicidal tendencies.
The question I am bursting to ask is, why do we need a drug for something which is a product of factors likely to be unrelated to the child’s mental state.
But asking that questions will show me up as a pharmaceutical non-believer. Because logic isn’t important here. What is important is that every problem must have its own approved drug.
I’d love to write more on this issue but I’ve got to take my pills now. I’m trialling a new drug for people who don’t enjoy paying bank fees.
A mother not associated with my school told me of her concerns regarding her 3-year old child. The 3-year old is much shorter than others in her age bracket and the comments about her childs’ height have started to make the child self-conscious. The mother is worried that the stigma of being much shorter than her peers may deeply erode the child’s self-confidence. Doctor’s have recommended starting the child on growth hormones to alleviate some of the height discrepancy. The mother is extremely dedicated and loving, and refuses to take that option as she doesn’t see it in the best interests of her child.
This example highlights a problem that keeps getting bigger and more difficult to deal with. Why are young children more self-conscious about their body now than ever before? What are we doing about it?
It seems as if the problem is getting worse and we are becoming less able to respond to it.
Pre-teens have never been so obsessed with their looks and so insecure about their imperfections. I read an article that points to a recent study in the UK where almost 600 children below the age of 13 have been treated in hospital for eating disorders in the past three years.
Many point to the advertising industry. They blame magazine covers and their gaunt models for creating an unrealistic perception of the average body size and type.
But isn’t advertising just a mirror of our own hopes and dreams? If they put more meat on Barbie’s unhealthily skinny body, wouldn’t sales be adversely affected?
What bothers me is that parents face an uphill battle with empowering their children to be content with their own looks. No matter how much time and energy they put into trying to make their children feel secure and attractive, peers and others in society tend to tear them down.
Has the problem gone too far to remedy? Is blaming the advertisers and media really worth the trouble? How much power do parents have in helping their children overcome societies unhealthy and unrealistic obsession with body image and beauty?
When we were young climbing was a great adrenaline rush. I remember the enjoyment I had climbing trees with my friends. Nowadays, climbing trees have been deemed too unsafe and even the basic play equipment has been watered down to avoid accidents, and in turn, fun.
Current safety standards veer public playgrounds towards the benign realm of soft and cushy: sharp edges are covered, jungle gyms and monkey bars are miniaturized to reduce the height children can climb and the whole things are placed on shock-absorbent wood chips or rubber mats to cushion the blow when children inevitably fall.
But are we really doing our children any favors by taking all the risk out of playtime? Some pediatric experts are saying no — in the pursuit of protection for our children, we have stunted their ability to fend for themselves.
In a recent paper published in the journal Evolutionary Psychology, Norwegian psychologists Ellen Sandseter of Queen Maud University in Norway and Leif Kennair of the Norwegian University for Science and Technology write that “risky play” among young children is a necessary experience that helps children learn to master their environments. Protecting children from any risks in their playtime could breed children that are more likely to be anxious and afraid of danger.
“An exaggerated safety focus of children’s play is problematic because while on the one hand children should avoid injuries, on the other hand they might need challenges and varied stimulation to develop normally, both physically and mentally,” the authors write. “Paradoxically, we posit that our fear of children being harmed by mostly harmless injuries may result in more fearful children and increased levels of psychopathology,” they add. “We might need to provide more stimulating environments for children, rather than hamper their development.”
Dr. Gary Smith, director of the Center for Injury Research and Policy at Nationwide Children’s Hospital, says the slow disappearance of more traditional “risky” playground toys has more to do with litigation than with proven safety issues.
Let kids be kids. Grazes and bruises use to be worth it for the sheer enjoyment of the great outdoors.
Whether it was a legitimate attempt or just a joke, it is a very sad and sorry look at the inherent selfishness in some parts of our society.
A VICTORIAN woman is being investigated after offering her two young children for sale to the highest bidder on internet auction site eBay.
The woman, in her early 30s, lives near Geelong. She wrote a “lengthy sales pitch” that included photographs of her son and daughter, both aged under 10.
Several people placed bids on the sickening auction, which has alarmed authorities.
Detectives from the Sexual Offences and Child Abuse unit were alerted to the internet page by a horrified member of the public.
The page has been taken down and the woman’s children could be taken into permanent care.
Victoria Police has decided not to press charges against the mum, who claims the act was a joke.
However, police sources told the Sunday Herald Sun they were disturbed by the incident and in particular the genuine bidders who tried to obtain the children.
Officers continue to probe the people who bid on the children and the Department of Human Services is continuing its investigation into the family.
Father and computer expert, Bill Ramsey sets a good example for other parents concerned about what their children get up to online:
“The internet has really changed the way that children interact with the world and not always for good,” said Bill Ramsey. He’s owns The Bill Guy Technology Solutions and is a dad. He says you have to know who your kids are chatting with on places like Facebook. “There are so many parents that say I don’t care that they put that stuff up there and I tell them they should. You should care,” he said.
He cares so much, he requires his 15-year-old step daughter provide her passwords so he can access everything, including text messages. He says she doesn’t like it but knows if she breaks the rules she’ll lose her computer privileges. By checking her email recently, he found emails from a guy who asked she send pictures of herself. She didn’t do it, but he says she also didn’t understand why it was a big deal. “So what this is a person I’ll never see. But you don’t know this. You don’t know who this is,” he said.
Ramsey was able to find the boy who lived in Arkansas and called his parents. He says that also shows how easy it is to track people down with information posted on-line. The National Center for Exploited and Missing Children say one in seven youth between the ages of 10 and 17 have received a sexual solicitation on the internet. Ramsey says that’s enough to know what your kids are up to. “It’s not an invasion of their privacy,” he said.
Obviously Ramsey is good with computers and has an easier time keeping track on his child’s on-line activity. But he says it’s not difficult if you put in some effort. He says having passwords is the most helpful but it’s also good just to visit their Facebook page. If getting a password won’t work, he says there are several software programs that offer various amounts of protection and some at a cost.
He recommends checking out, http://www.webwatchernow.com, http://www.netnanny.com and http://www.cyberpatrol.com
Shame on you David Ludwig for making a conclusion that belies all common sense and sensitivity. How can you justify the idea of taking children away from their parents because of their obesity? How is such a move in the best interest of the child?
Should parents lose custody of their kids if they get too fat?
A commentary in Wednesday’s Journal of the American Medical Association says yes.
Harvard obesity specialist David Ludwig says putting children in temporary foster care can be more ethical than providing weight-loss surgery – but only in extreme cases.
Ludwig says the point is not to punish the parents – but to act in the child’s best interest, and provide care that the parents do not or cannot provide.
Ludwig says the goal is to get those kids back to their parents as soon as possible – and for parents to learn the proper ways to prevent future obesity.
There have previous calls for government intervention, in cases where parents either neglect or refuse proper efforts to control a child’s extreme weight.
A doctor from London cited a Wisconsin case from 2009 in which a 440-pound 16-year-old almost died at UW Hospital in Madison.
Doctors had talked about reporting the parents for neglect – but they didn’t have to, because the girl later lost 100 pounds with her family’s help.
The Journal article comes a week after an annual study reported that 27-percent of Wisconsin adults are obese.
This method will further punish a child with enough to contend with as it is. No parent wants their child to be obese. Yes, some do more than others to avoid obesity, but that doesn’t mean that they are not loving and caring parents. Many of them, as reported, suffer from obesity themselves.
As a society we must learn to support rather than threaten. The child’s welfare does not rely on just a loss of weight but also the continued love and support from their parents. We must not fingerpoint or punish parents for obesity. It won’t help one bit. Instead we must offer as much support, education and guidance as we can to ensure that families are able to pass up cheap calorie laden products for the more expensive, yet far more healthy alternatives.
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