Teachers Are Not Their Students’ Parents

A teacher defends kissing, cuddling and touching the behind of a female student by claiming that is the way he treats his own children.  And how did the authorities respond to this pathetic defense of an indefensible action?  They bought it hook, line and sinker.

A TEACHER who kissed and cuddled a schoolgirl defended himself by saying that was how he treated his own children. Jeffrey Cave, who taught at Willows Primary School, in Basildon, also pulled a boy’s hair and then told him that was how “teachers used to handle misbehaving pupils”.

He was found guilty of unacceptable professional conduct and has been reprimanded by the General Teaching Council.

Mr Cave touched a girl pupil on her bottom over her clothing, allowed her to sit on his lap, kissed her head and cuddled her.

Mr Cave admitted in his witness statement kissing her head and cuddling her, but said that was the same way he showed affection to his own children.

He said during police interview he stroked the pupil’s bottom over clothing in a downwards motion to test if her trousers were dry.

The hearing heard Cave. who has had a clean professional history for 26 years. was going through a period of personal stress at the time of the incidents, and his actions were not sexually motivated.

I have no doubt that the soft “reprimand” response came about from his defense.  Their soft ruling sends a very bad message.  The public must be reasuured that teachers can not in any way show affection to students in the same way as parents do.  I am a parent too, but I have no right to treat my students like my children.

My message to all male teachers is to avoid being in a room alone with a student, act with professionalism and integrity at all times and keep your hands to yourself.

They are not your children, they are someone elses.

 

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4 Responses to “Teachers Are Not Their Students’ Parents”

  1. randomyriad Says:

    What if a female teacher acted in this way? Would anyone notice? I doubt it. The pulling hair thing seems much more offensive and objectionable. How do you never touch a student and have a legitimate human relationship with them. If a child wants to hug you, or comes to you for comfort. You as there adult protector have to ward them off. I am sure that mental abuse as well as physical abuse happen all the time without any adverse public reaction. I lived through a public school education, and I feared most of my male teachers as well as many female teachers. But, I was often hurt more by their lack of connection with me as an individual. Most of them seemed to see me as either a problem or when I was “behaving” not a problem. They had techniques usually fear based to keep me in the “behaving” category. And as far as I can tell very little has changed. Teachers are human and children are human, and it is often a sterile and unnatural environment we send children into when we send them to school. How does this affect the quality of education?

    • Michael G. Says:

      Thanks for your thoughtful comment.

      Unfortunately, the sad reality is a male teacher cannot teach with the same liberties as a female teacher. Whilst a female teacher can have students on their lap, males cannot do that. It just isn’t ethical. Having said that, this girl was touched and kissed. No teacher, male or female, should touch a student’s bottom or kiss them.

      I’ve discussed emotional and especially physical abuse by teachers a great deal on this blog. I am outspoken on my views on corporal punishment. And I agree that the pulling hair allegation is a big one as well.

      I believe that a teacher can have a connection with his/her students without hugging, kissing or touching their them. I don’t think its fair to use the argument that proper professional conduct leads to emotional distance.

  2. shannicefx Says:

    MR CAVE TEACHED ME WHEN I WAS AT THE WILLOWS PRIMARY SCHOOL.
    HE WAS MY GYMNASTICS TEACHER, MR CAVE HAS NEVER TOUCHED ME , HES CUDDLED ME AFTER MY EVENT THAT ID WON IN GYMNASTICS BY EVEN MY PARENTS PERMISSION, AS HE WAS VERY PROUD WITH WHAT HE DONE.
    MR CAVE IS NOT THE PERSON YOUR MAKING HIM OUT TO BE.
    HE TAUGHT US ALL WELL AND WAS A VERY GOOD TEACHER , MOST OF MY FRIENDS AND PUPILS THAT WENT TO THE WILLOWS AGREED AND CLASSED HIM AS ONE OF THE BEST TEACHERS UNTILL HE LEFT, WE ALL MISS HIM VERY MUCH AND ALL THIS ACCUSING IS WRONG
    MABEE HE SHOULDNT HAVE PULLED THE BOYS HAIR , BUT HE WAS A DIFFERENT SORT OF TEACHER HE WOULD HAVE A LAUGH WITH THE KIDS, WHY GETTING ON WITH THE WORK.

    I DONT THINK THIS IS VERY FAIR!, YOUVE GOT THIS ALL WRONG!

  3. Michael G. Says:

    I have no doubt that he has great qualities and has been a good teacher. My post wasn’t so much about his actions (which were not professional) but with his feeble defence. I am so glad to hear he was a fabulous teacher but at the same token I hope he sees there is a difference between how one deals with their children as opposed to their students.

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